"The
surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that none
of it has tried to contact us."
-Bill Watterson
"Capital
punishment would be more effective as a preventive measure if it were
administered prior to the crime."
-Woody Allen
"In
theory there is no difference between theory and practice. In practice there
is." -Chuck Reid
"If
you are looking for a fly in your food, it means that you are full." - South African Proverb
"If
the facts don't fit the theory, change the facts." -Albert Einstein
"The
odds against there being a bomb on a plane are a million to one, and against
two bombs a million times a million to one. Next time you fly, cut the odds and
take a bomb." -Benny Hill
"First
they ignore you, then they laugh at you, then they fight you, and then you
win." -Mahatma Ghandi
"If
the only tool you have is a hammer, you tend to see every problem as a
nail." -Abraham Maslow
"I never forget a face, but in your
case I'll be glad to make an exception."
-Groucho Marx
"Half of the American people have never read a newspaper. Half never voted for President. One hopes it is the same half." -Gore Vidal
"I would never die for my beliefs
because I might be wrong." -Bertrand Russell
"Don't worry if you're a kleptomaniac,
you can always take something for it."
-unknown
"It is bad luck to be superstitious." -Andrew W. Mathis
A Buddhist Monk walked up to a hot dog vendor and said "Make me one with everything." -unknown
“Next to knowing when to seize an opportunity, the most important thing in life is to know when to forego an advantage.” -Benjamin Disraeil
"Violence is the first refuge of the incompetent." – Issac Asimov
"War is only a cowardly escape from the problems of peace." – Thomas Mann
"Once the game is over, the king and the pawn go back in the same box." -Italian proverb
"The fact that a believer is happier than a skeptic is no more to the point than the fact that a drunken man is happier than a sober one." -George Bernard Shaw
"I contend that we are both atheists. I just believe in one fewer god than you do. When you understand why you dismiss all the other possible gods, you will understand why I dismiss yours." -Stephen Roberts
"I'm a polyatheist - there are many gods I don't believe in." -Dan Fouts
"People who think they know everything tend to irritate those of us who do." -Oscar Wilde
"Everyone knows that time is Death, that Death hides in clocks." -Federico Fellini
"Heredity is nothing but stored environment." -Luther Burbank
"Trees are 90 percent air." –Arnold Palmer
“The major cause of problems are solutions.” -Eric Severeid
“Fear always springs from ignorance.” -Ralph Waldo Emerson
“The reasonable man adapts himself to the world; the unreasonable one persists in trying to adapt the world to himself. Therefore all progress depends on the unreasonable man.” -G.B. Shaw from ‘Man and Superman’
“Until lions have their historians, tales of the hunt shall always glorify the hunters.” -African Proverb
"Truth always rests with the minority, and the minority is always stronger than the majority, because the minority is generally formed by those who really have an opinion, while the strength of a majority is illusory, formed by the gangs who have no opinion -- and who, therefore, in the next instant (when it is evident that the minority is the stronger) assume its opinion ... while Truth again reverts to a new minority." -Soren Kierkegaard - (1813-1855) Danish philosopher
“When one person suffers from a delusion, it is called insanity. When many people suffer from a delusion it is called Religion.” -Robert M. Pirsig
"A man's most valuable trait is a judicious sense of what not to believe." -Euripides 485-406 B.C.
“There once was a time when all people believed in God and the church ruled. This time was called the Dark Ages.” -Richard Lederer
“Pray to God, fine; but keep rowing to shore.” -Russian proverb
“’There are no atheists in foxholes’ isn't an argument against atheism, it's an argument against foxholes.” -James Morrow
“Faith is the fabric of psychosis.” -B. Smith
“I do not believe in an afterlife, although I am bringing a change of underwear.” -Woody Allen
"The Earth is not dying. It is being killed, and the people killing it have names and addresses." -Utah Phillips
"Physics is like sex. Sure, it may give some practical results, but that's not why we do it." -Richard Feynman, Physicist
“All the problems we face in the United States today can be traced to an unenlightened immigration policy on the part of the American Indian.” - Pat Paulsen
"Capitalism is the extraordinary belief that the nastiest of men for the nastiest of motives will somehow work for the benefit of all." -John Maynard Keynes
"If I love you, what business is it of yours?" -Goethe
"We are made wise not by the recollection of our past, but by the responsibility for our future." -- George Bernard Shaw
“In the Soviet Union, capitalism triumphed over communism. In this country [USA], capitalism triumphed over democracy.” - Fran Lebowitz
"When authorities warn you of the sinfulness of sex, there is an important lesson to be learned. Do not have sex with the authorities." -Matt Groening
“Seize the moment. Remember all those women on the titanic who waved off the dessert cart.” -Erma Bombeck
"Apathy is the glove into which evil slips its hand" -Bodie Thoene
“Of Chess it has been said that life is not long enough for it, but that is the fault of life, not Chess” -William Ewart Napier
“A person without a god is like a fish without a bicycle.” -unknown
"What gets us into trouble is what we know for sure, that is not true." -Mark Twain